Veterans Day honors and ceremonies are a big part of civic life in San Diego — the region's almost 200,000 veterans make up about 15% of the population.
In a way, recognition of veterans last week at the San Diego LGBT Community Center was no different — a Navy color guard paraded the colors, the national anthem was sung and veterans delivered speeches recalling their service and sacrifice.
But the Pentagon's decades of discrimination and criminalization of LGBTQ+ people haunts this community like a specter, never far from anyone's old "war" stories.
"When you have a sword of Damocles over your head, you know, you always had to be careful," said Army veteran Robert Granat.
Seven San Diego veterans are in this year's class of inductees into the center's Wall of Honor, two posthumously. The Wall of Honor commemorates San Diego LGBTQ+ veterans in hopes their "courage, bravery and sacrifices" will inspire future generations.
Granat said he was surprised to find out he was being recognized,
"I thought it was a little strange at first because I didn't think I really did anything to deserve it," he said. "I am quite honored."
Granat was drafted into the Army Reserves in 1969 despite pursuing several college degrees to avoid going to Vietnam, he said. But serving reluctantly was a better option for him than the surefire option to leave the service — admitting his sexuality.
"It was either (serve) or check off that little square that I was a homosexual," Granat said. "In this age if you were going into business one did not do that. I mean, I would not have had a career."
The San Diego Gay Men's Chorus and the San Diego Women's Chorus kicked Thursday evening's ceremony off with a stirring rendition of the Star Spangled Banner.
One by one, veterans rose to speak about their military service. Most said they just wanted to serve and do something bigger than themselves — a common enough sentiment among people who join. All said they struggled once in uniform due to aspects of their identities.
Wall of Honor inductee Pele Crone said she never apologized for who she was, serving openly as a lesbian in the Army from 1978 to 1980.
"I'm not ashamed of who I am, and I just refused to be quiet about it," Crone said. "I don't care who likes me or — even if it means prison, even if it means my life — I'm not backing down from that."
Crone was among the first women to attend Army boot camp in an integrated male-female platoon. She said she was lucky in the Army to have a commanding officer who supported her — she never got in trouble for her sexuality even while serving openly.
But there was one part of Army culture she couldn't escape — sexism.
"Being gay and being out wasn't the issue," Crone said. "It was more just being a woman. I would have been a lifer — I would have retired. But ... the harassment — it was really horrific."
It's not unusual when talking to LGBTQ+ veterans to hear people served just one tour, if that. For decades LGBTQ+ people were barred from military service. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell took effect in 1994 and allowed them to serve – but only by staying closeted.
In 2011, the ban was lifted.
During her induction speech, Marine veteran Randye Hedgecoke said the day she joined was one of the best of her life. But just a year and a half later, she was discharged — forced out — with a so-called "bad paper" discharge. The DD-214 form she'd need to verify her service with anyone said, in black and white, that she was discharged for "sexual perversion."
She said the center is helping restore honor, dignity and respect to people whose military contributions might otherwise be forgotten.
"We found it necessary to hide ourselves," Hedgecoke said. "Leave no man behind? We were not only left behind, we were tossed out. Our service was not valued equal to any other military member."
Hedgecoke had her discharge upgraded last year. In September, the Pentagon proactively upgraded discharges for hundreds of veterans forced out under Don't Ask, Don't Tell. But those discharged prior to 1994 bush individually request upgrades.
Those discharges are the subject of a federal lawsuit now working its way through the courts.
